How to Find Your Twin Flame (Step by Step)

I started noticing a trend a while ago. It seems to be increasingly common to feel a yearning or a draw towards… something. A missing part of yourself. It’s about time we look at how to find your twin flame if you don’t know who they are but you feel they’re out there somewhere.

The simple fact that you know you’re missing the second part of your soul is a good sign. Finding this other part of your soul is more than just finding this other person, however. In order to find them and (more importantly) be ready for union you’re going to need to focus on yourself for a while.

Not everyone is going to follow the exact same path but after speaking to thousands of people at various stages of their journey, I do think there are some definite patterns and steps you can follow.

Note: most of our guides are geared towards people already on various stages of their twin flame journey and have met them in the 2D. This is one of the few I’ve done to try and help in finding your twin flame if you’re just beginning your journey.

The Steps to Finding Them

The lucky among us will be able to skip one or more of these steps but this is a rough outline of how most journeys go trying to meet your twin flame.

Feel the ‘Pull’

finding your twin flame

A twin flame connection starting long before you ever physically meet. You’re likely to feel like there’s something more out there or that you’re missing a part of yourself. Twin flames are two parts of the same soul that have split into two bodies – it’s hard to express exactly how that feels but we can sum it up into one word.


The first step to finding your twin is to actually start looking. Feeling that pull toward them is the common first step whether you’ve physically met them or not. It usually heralds an awakening and the beginning of your journey to a true twin flame relationship.

Considering you’re reading this it’s likely that searching for something has brought you here. You might have already found this pull of a twin flame connection – but what now?

Be Honest

… with yourself.

The allure of a twin flame connection is tempting and social media is full of success stories. Speaking as someone who’s spoken to literally thousands of people going through the twin flame journey I see people trying to ‘force it’.

It can be incredibly hard to tell when you’re on a twin flame journey. Doubt and fear is a common part of the early stages of a twin flame relationship.

If there’s one takeaway I want you to remember from any of this is finding your twin flame cannot be forced. There are things you can do to make it more likely (which we’ll get to in a moment) but trying to force that feeling is the fastest way to wind up with a false twin flame.

There’s no set timeline here. For some, it might happen quickly while others are going to need to exercise some patience. I know how strong that pull can feel but you’re going to need to be honest with yourself about how you truly feel. Not how you want to feel.

Self Growth

personal growth

Bear with me on this one.

I promise I will cover external things in a moment and I get that it’s not always exciting to look inward when you’re trying to meet your twin flame but this is a big part of the journey. Too many people gloss over this because it’s just not fun or sexy but there’s a reason it’s so damn important.

You’ve probably heard of people talk about stages of separation and the pain which comes with all of that. This happens entirely because twin flames meet too early.

Focusing on yourself and your own spiritual path not only makes it far more likely to actually meet your twin flame to begin with – it makes it far more likely you’ll reach union together.

The more spiritually advanced you are, the more likely you’ll reach your twin flame. Some are lucky to have done more work in past lives towards this or started earlier this life without understanding why they were doing it.

Wherever your starting point is now – the true path on how to find your twin flame is learning how to find yourself.

Following the Signs

And now we get to the fun part you’re really looking for.

There are a lot of different types of signs and life-changing energy trying to lead the two of you together. Probably the most commonly talked about are twin flame numbers (I do suggest reading this if you haven’t already).

These signs and patterns span different stages of your journey. They’ll give you guidance and reassurance during difficult phases but they can also lead you straight to your twin flame.

The universe sends you unlikely patterns and signs when it’s trying to draw your attention to something. It could be something obvious like you both share the same birthday or you keep seeing the same time on your clock when you think of them.

Sometimes the signs are a little harder to spot but the more you keep your eyes out for them, the more guidance you’ll be able to receive. Just remember the first rule – be honest with yourself and don’t try to force it.

How Do I Recognize My Twin Flame?

Recognize My Twin Flame

This is an interesting one.

You might have heard stories about powerful attraction from across the room the second your eyes meet. Or unconditional love with a complete stranger that overcame you both.

And these are absolutely twin flame signs which you might well experience but twin flame energy can be a little bit more complex than this.

There’s an energy between the two of you and it’s entirely common for that energy to appear as attraction and for early stages to involve a deep romance and physical… elements.

This energy is a little harder to understand. Few things in a twin flame journey are that simple and your first meeting with a twin flame might fly in an entirely opposite direction. Sometimes the energies will clash and you might immediately reject one another.

As I said, twin flame relationships aren’t exactly simple. The one thing you can be sure of is you won’t casually miss them. Something will stick out to you – it just won’t always be immediate head over heels love.

However that energy first manifests, you’ll likely see an increase of external signs trying to get your attention and making sure you don’t miss this opportunity.

Is it Rare to Find Your Twin Flame?

This answer is really in two parts and it’s important you hear me out here because I don’t want you to get disheartened.

Despite what some social media feeds might have you believe it’s the twin flame journey is incredibly rare. You only have to look around at the people in your life to realize that most relationships are not twin flames. Very, very few people have even heard of a twin flame let alone feel that pull towards the other part of their soul.

We only have one twin flame (and we’ll get to how rare even that is in a moment). Most happy relationships you do know are likely soul mates and not a twin flame relationship.


In my experience, if you’ve somehow made it this far then you’re already ahead of the curve. If you’re spiritually advanced enough to be searching for your twin flame then, while it’s certainly not guaranteed, it’s absolutely a possibility.

While the lucky among us won’t have to actively do anything but wait around for the universe to deliver – this isn’t a tactic I’d suggest. It’s entirely possible for twin flames to fail in reaching union this lifetime. Take the initiative and follow the advice given here to give yourself the best chance to find your twin flame.

Just because it’s rare doesn’t mean you should give up, trust me it’s worth it.

Does Everyone Have a Twin Flame?

I’ve gone into more detail on this one already but I’ll try to sum it up a bit.

No, not everyone has a twin flame. However, we all have the potential to have a twin flame. If you’re here, there’s a strong possibility that you do have a twin flame out there – but it’s not a certainty. And it’s likely that most of the people around you don’t have one and won’t yet be aware of the journey.

Social media is leading to a growth in twin flame popularity which is great in that it’s going to bring a lucky few closer to union sooner than they would otherwise – but it’s causing a vast misunderstanding of what a twin flame really is. Don’t fall into the trap of convincing yourself of a false twin flame just because you’ve heard the term. Hold out for the real thing.

Keep Working Towards It

If you’re feeling that pull but there’s no clear sign of them in your life it doesn’t mean you should just give up.

This isn’t an overnight journey.

Sometimes they will just show up in your life and overcome it like a tidal wave. Sometimes it’ll be a slow process. If you do give up hope there’s a chance they will just show up in your life unexpectedly but the more you do to help yourself the more likely you are to meet them.

Focus on yourself and watch for external signs. When you boil it right down past all the fluff – that’s what it comes down to. If you want further guidance, take a moment to share the details and get a twin flame reading.

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  • I've worked with hundreds of clients from around the world and there's one thing I see constantly

    No two twin flame journeys are ever exactly the same. Sure, we talk about signs and patterns which a lot of us experience but there are always variations.

    The path to your twin flame union is full of pitfalls. False twin flames, doubt and painful separation phases. It can be the hardest thing we'll ever go through - and it's still worth it in the end.

    We have a lot of guides and stories on twin flame journeys but, if you need it, I also do custom twin flame readings to get as much insight as I can into your journey.

    I can help pinpoint if you've met your twin flame already, if you're in a relationship with a false twin flame or what you need to do to meet them if you haven't already.

    Just answer honestly and with as much detail as possible. Anything you tell me will be in the strictest confidence.

    Please note this is a custom reading based on your journey and can take up to 24 hours to prepare and send to you.

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